Patrick Holland

I was meant to own a candy factory by now. And be a recluse. Like Willy Wonka, only without the golden tickets or the spoiled kids mucking around my river of chocolate. No Oompa Loompas, either. Creepy.

Maybe Hobbits.

But here's the thing... I don't have a candy factory. Or a Hobbit. I am a bit reclusive, though. So there's that.

I'm not entirely sure why I created this page. Except that I didn't want any other Patrick Holland to get it. I'm a recluse with an ego, I guess. Or maybe I'm hoping a Hobbit will read this and ping me.

Bring your own chocolate river, little fella.