Chris Sterry

After over 60 years of life you would think, that at least I should know who I am. But do I, lets see.

I was born in Sheffield UK in July and if you believe in the Signs of the Zodiac that would make me to be Cancer (The Crab).

Throughout my life, certainly my early life, I would appear to be a typical Cancerian. extremely sensitive, certainly in the company of others, not making conversation and where ever possible to try to blend into the background, so as not to be noticed. When introduced to someone new, I was always unsure what to say and in most cases said very little, except to acknowledge them by saying hello to them. But to then engage in any form of conversation, I would do my best to shy away from it, leaving it hopefully to others. This meant, as I found out later in life, gave the impression that I was rude, not interested and indifferent to people. But nothing could have been further from the truth, I just did not have the confidence to talk to people.

During my school years I was not fully aware of my sensitivity, although did easily become embarrassed in company, often to the point of blushing profusely. This made me feel even more uncomfortable in company.

When I left school and took up employment, my sensitivity did not appear be part of my every day existence, as with the training provided, I knew my subject material and had the confidence to use this knowledge when dealing with people in the profession I was in, which was dealing with Life Assurance and Pensions. I knew that I would never be able to gain the confidence to go and sell the products to others and therefore concentrated in dealing with the administration. During my 25 years in the insurance industry, I did progress throughout the company, albeit only in the Sheffield Branch, but did eventually succeed to become the Administration Manager of the Sheffield Branch. With the continuing promotion, I was becoming more aware of how my sensitivity was affecting myself in my professional role, especially when becoming the Administration Manager. When this only involved dealing with the subject relating to the various contracts, I could easily be involved in meetings and meeting people.

When it came to social occasions, this was when I had major problems, as Administration Manager I had to attend certain events and functions and I was always ill at ease when I had to enter into 'small talk' with others.

Now I can't stop.