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Ashwin Deshpande

Ah! Big time zobless student pursuing enGineeRing.The statement below is true, the statement above is false. Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former. Some would say it is better to rule in Hell than to serve in Heaven. I view these ideas as pessimistic. I plan to conquer both Heaven and Hell. There is a theory which states that if anybody ever discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable. There is another theory which states that this has already happened. Sometimes I think the surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that none of it has tried to contact us. If you’re good at something, never do it for free. Reality continues to ruin my life. In the beginning the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and been widely regarded as a bad move. When NASA first started sending up astronauts, they quickly discovered that ballpoint pens would not work in zero gravity. To combat the problem, NASA scientists spent a decade and $12 billion to develop a pen that writes in zero gravity, upside down, underwater, on almost any surface including glass and at temperatures ranging from below freezing to 300 C. After his first training session in heaven, George Best, from his favourite right wing, turned the head of God who was filling in at left-back. He nutmegged him and scored a wonderful goal from 30 yards out. I would love him to save me a place in his team - George Best that is, not God.