In 1996 someone told me I had a duck laugh. I do. Totally do. See also: Chubby armpits. A penchant for salt. And the complete and total inability to forgive mean people. Fortunately for all of us, I became a writer instead of a serial killer. Unfortunately for the U.S. Patent and Trademark Office, the name of the Webby award-winning blog I've been writing since 2009 is *actually* called The Middle Finger Project—a gesture less meant for your neighbor, and more for what I call The Committee of True and Actual Greatness, the fictitious organization we're all secretly waiting for approval from.

My advice? When the endorsement doesn't come, endorse yourself.

XOXO, Ash