Christine Findlay

Hello, my name is Christine and my husbands name is Josh and we have been married for five years. Like many couples we have struggled with having a family. I have had one miscarriage and several unsuccessful attempts through fertility drugs trying to have a baby. Today we are heading toward our adoption journey. I can't say I don't have mix emotions when I do. My heart still aches to have biological children and wonder if at 43 years of age if this is even possible. When we had our miscarriage the doctor said how sorry he was and that there was no reason why I can't carry a baby. I am 21 pounds over weight, I am older, and I am stressed all the time. All three factors could be the issue or maybe the Lord is saying it just isn't meant to be. The last time I went to see my doctor was October of 2011. I often tell myself we should try again but the time just has not felt right. An other reason why we have not gone back is because of the major melt downs I was having while trying to have a baby. One melt down that stands out the most happened at work. It went on for the good part of the morning. I had to go into my managers office at one point to calm down. It has been a slow and long process to get out of my funk I had been in since the miscarriage. It is alot of work to hide how sad you are while at work. Keeping a smile on your face, acting like your on top of the world is just as stressful as being stressed because of your job. Does that make any sense? Today I am working on my photography and trying to figure out how to move up from my job. Josh and I are still going foward with our journey and know what that what ever path the Lord takes us on will be what is ment to be. We are looking forward to what the Lord as planned for us through our adoption.