At a young age, I mastered the art of time travel, taught to me by whales from the Northern Lands of Riversome. Fast forwarding through life, a goat in an Iron Man costume chased me down the Vegas strip and kidnapped me, forcing me to write and keep writing till the year 3000. Escaping through a barrel over Niagara Falls, I managed to find my way back to the year 2000, where I learned to harness the power of persuasion, lemon taming, and the dark arts of fireworks. Currently residing in an island three paces away from my own mind, I live in a cave with nothing but a well-lit candle, which never goes out, along with several action figures that I (perhaps a “she” with time) call brother, sister, and madre. My only vice, cloning dogs and rabbits to save the world.