Ian Harris

It was in the early 1950′s when my parents private plane (with me on board) crash landed in central Africa in the area known as the Fucarwi Region. Unfortunately my parents were killed whilst I was ‘adopted’ by a herd of Wildebeests. How I survived I do not know but after many years of running with the herd I was discovered at a watering hole by Professor Von Kitchen late of Strasbourg University. Unfortunately and before I could tell him my story Professor Von Kitchen shot my ‘adoptive parents’ and along with his entourage ate them for lunch, an action that he never forgave himself for.

After raising me as one of his own, I came (at the age of 21) with the Professor to Stratford upon Avon where he lived out his life, unsuccessfully trying to prove that Shakespeare was a retired Policeman from Blackpool.

I return on a five yearly basis to the Fucarwi region for the great migration and to renew old acquaintances.