jackie harris

Born in Glasgow. Och Aye. Brought up on ‘mince and tatties’, macaroon bars (soooo good) and Irn Bru.

At 17 I lived in Portugal and got to travel to school on a hovercraft. The country was full of swarthy, budgie smuggler wearing men with mullet hairdos. I fell madly in love with those Portuguese custard tart things. Crisp flaky pastry, creamy custard filling and a sticky caramelly bit on top.

Went to Strathclyde in Glasgow and spent most of my time and money on punk bands. While under the influence of Vodka, my mate Liz and I jumped up onto the stage with Bob Geldof & Boomtown Rats. We were frog-marched from the building by bouncers. We were often spotted in the City Centre carrying kettles as handbags (don’t ask).

Got my first proper job as a junior account executive (general dogsbody) in a London ad agency. No Apple macs back then. I spent two years high from ‘Spray Mount’ fumes. Discovered ‘happy hour’ at the cocktail bar at the Mayfair Hotel. There were real mini crocodiles in a tropical water feature.

Blagged a job as the PR Manager with Lotus Software. Turned out I was really good at it. A glittering career in high-tech PR followed. Managed big brands and big egos. Travelled lots. When escorting an IBM ‘big wig’ on a European press tour, he complained that the French were smoking in Charles de Gaulle airport. Then he ordered me to DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT - yeah right!

Viva Las Vegas. Met Darren, fell in love. We had a Singing Elvis wedding in Las Vegas. Darren wore a star spangled banner sequinned waistcoat that he got in a ‘post 4th of July’ sale in the Caesar’s Palace gift shop.

The Great Outdoors. After years of travelling on the tube with my face often crammed into the sweaty armpit of a total stranger, I left London and the M25 and moved to the Lake District. Dealing with septic tanks, sheep on the roads and tea so strong you can feel hair growing on your chest, came as a bit of a shock. It’s been ten years, I’m getting used to it, but my love of weak Earl Grey tea is a topic of derision up and down the county.

Copywriting and marketing. I started Brightspark Marketing in 2004. I have a knack for pointing out the bollocks. Some people love that about me, other people hate it. But I’m ok with that.