No need to be frightened. Despite my intimidating, alpha-like presence piercing through your screen, I (am proudly) not a leader. This may not seem like a deal-breaker to many, but when competing for jobs, applying to schools, or even being a woman in a society where you’ve been expected to submit for generations, I always find myself having to prove that I can lead. Which, rest assured, I won’t…but why should I?

I once led a biology club giving countless presentations, organizing activities and advertising the club, only for my sponsor to tell other people how “lazy” I am. The same sponsor who couldn’t even respond to text messages. Who’s really the lazy one?

Another time, I was President of the Astronomy club which started off with 10 and ended off with 4 members. So maybe there was some truth to my sponsor’s words, but I still think I did pretty decent.

Not long after that, I realized I much prefer being a “lone wolf” instead of an “alpha wolf”. Perhaps it's the fact I’m an only child and have been raised to enjoy the presence in absences. Or maybe my poor leadership skills. Nevertheless, I started embracing not being responsible for anyone else so I wouldn’t be met with disappointment. Instead, I let them be responsible for me. As I stroll in the park admiring the birds chirping and the leaves gliding through the wind, I picture myself as that leaf. On my most fun days, I’m rampaging through villages in Minecraft, watching YouTube videos, journaling, or playing word search (yes people still play them). If I was a leader, I’d have my life together and wake up at 5 AM to hit the gym.

Although I did fail leading the Biology and Astronomy clubs, they still allowed me to know that I wanted to major in Biological Engineering with a minor in Astrophysics. So, as much as I hate being a leader, I’m glad I tried being one because that’s how it got me here.