lindsey Kolb

Things that I have recently come to just realize to me has revealed that I have achieved my one enlightenment. I had no idea of this at the time it was happening and found out later what everything meant. In a short crash course period of time ...ALL AT ONCE!! eventually coming to realize that the answer doesn't only lie in ourselves rather the earth the moon the stars and even a different approach to where animals and plants and even unknown things have been shown to me on a large scale where we are universally ALL connected as one . HOwever, there are other things which have different fates of our own that conflict with others making one person's fate Completely different from the next persons ... I was adopted and raised into a Catholic family where I always knew that I was different . I am 29 born female I identify as gender queer. I have always realized that I was not like other people in my life and it always overwhelmed me bc I had always come to believe that I would always fail ...and I did ... I failed everytime!! It took me 29 years to learn the bigger picture that i have simply come to peace with . I have my own fate and others tie into my fate but some fates i share with them wont continue in the future bc they will never understand or get me. And i will be exposed to things i have never had the correct perception to swallow the realization that my personal existance is to be happy and at peace with myself .have finally reached my enlightenment. But I need guidance . I don't have money to pay for readings or things on that nature .. I need advice . I am not trusting of many, I never have been. and I have treated my family like complete garbage . Not realizing that they are also part of a key to help me in aspects that were unknown to anything I had concerns or fear in looking or coming about it with a Christian aproatch. They will never get me or care to bc this spiritual enlightenment has not yet been reached within themselves . This makes me sad. My dad has been for the majority of my life Been very negative .. clouding my thoughts with influences of his own and doubts that he has used to show me that I never learn ... I'm not normal. .. and that whatever things I think I believe in aren't real... unfortunately. What I have come to realize is I wasn't Catholic to begin with. I have seen the thing which came to me one night I was at my emotional rock bottom where I was done dealing with everything . I had an x at the time who was into wicca. She has negatively influenced and corrupted my mind until I finally realized that there was a bigger plan and she was only going to hinder me from finding out what it is ...ever realize why it took me a numerous amount of bee stings as a kid. Where I finally realized not to step on a bee with bare feet at the pool . I have had a hard life realizing mostly failure to be the only way .. it just seems to be . But I saw one night at my darkest hour. A Buddha had appeared to me when my eyes wee closed .. wasn't sleeping my eyes were just closed. I was haunted by the influence of my x where I wasn't thinking clearly and realized this and used it to actually get myself outta a situation where I actually benefited from my negative x in the first place. I have come to see that seeing isn't believing ..AT ALL ! AND I feel like I have finally won! I achieved the thing most people in many many many lifetimes will never get to experience.. a full Enlightenment. My political views on certain things have my doubts as to what's been recently going on with the real issue . But that's a route that will have to take its course in order for the people who so ignorantly follow and are blinded by the past of their own dark times are now being called to 'use it against the people ' maybe not in a sense most people would see it rather using it to brain wash the people to give them a false sense of hope in turn always giving them some reason to make their own 'routes in life' (however much larger scale than just life everything as we know it will soon be revealed and I feel like the obvious was the obvious the whole time) and bc people were misguided and manipulated by promises and things they thought would help better them for selfish reasons or even bc it is just their fate or something I haven't learned yet of what it's called. I just have an eerie feeling of the outcome within the next few yrs and I'm not worried for myself rather for the human race. Just needed to have someone hear my life changing enlightenment .. like I said I do need positive guidance to get through all this the best way to benifits from my new found way of life... I just need directionThank you for reading . IF u want to be the one who helped me I would greatly appreciate any wisdom or views you have .thank you again .hope to ttys!LINDSEY KOLB