Lizzi Closson

I am 16 years old. I am a junior in highschool. I live in a small town.I have a bestfriend who killed himself at the age of sixteen.Because he was bullied in school.I have been suicidal ever since he died.I was bullied so I hid behind my friends.And if others tried to get close to me I would block them off. I couldn't trust any one. Since I began this year of school, boys have tried to get closer and I close them off. I have a boyfriend now, who is probably twice as quiet as I am. We are very quiet and we confide in each other all the time. I love this boy with all my heart.How do I tell him this?