Rutherford Hayes

Back in 1877, I was elected president of the United States. Well, not by the American people. They elected Sam Tilden. But I won the electoral college vote.
Before that, I was governor of Ohio. And before that, I served in the Civil War (for the Union.)

Anyhoo...After my body was laid to rest at my home and library in Fremont, Ohio - things slowed down for me quite a bit.

In 2008, due to federal budget cutbacks, the Secret Service no longer could protect me. Instead, they handed me an iPhone and told me to text them if I "ran into trouble."

Since getting the iPhone, I tweet a lot. I also watch a lot of pirated tv on the internet. There's not much to do in this crypt.

Also, in 1971, imagineers twinned my soul to create an animatronic doppleganger of myself which stands in the Hall of Presidents at Walt Disney World in Orlando. On occasion, I find myself inhabiting its body. I still don't know how that works.