Ray Hahn

I can divide by zero. I have never required adult supervision. I feel pain, but not like you think I do. I understand women. I am an expert at drip painting, and can make world-class tequila. I keep track of how many days old I am. I once staged a daring rescue of children from a collapsed mine using only a rope, a pad of Post-It Notes, and a can of compressed air. Most women in Ipanema know my name. I can sneeze with my eyes open. I have dined with presidents, danced with starlets, and drunk with Hemmingway. I have won the lottery only twice thus far. I am wanted in Cancun, but not by the authorities. I have donated 2 of my kidneys to transplant recipients. I taught myself how to roll dice and make them land as I wish, but found that it caused gambling to lose its thrill. I have spoken before the U.N. I never lie. When the need arises, I help the local authorities find missing persons. I can sense Magnetic North. Surprisingly, I am better known for my motocross skills than I am for my risque Summer fashion designs. I have pi memorized and can recite it backwards. I can hold my breath for 15 minutes under water. I fix broken lawn-mowers as a hobby, and I can kick a golf ball more than 100 yards. #19 on my list of "100 things to do before I die" is "Ask the citizens of Roswell, NM for forgiveness". 2 of the claims in this list are true (really!).