Keith Stattenfield

Keith Stattenfield is a man among men, or women, or whomever is standing nearby him. Sometimes even children, so in those cases Keith Stattenfield is a man among children. But, not in a creepy way; just in a "Look, there's Keith Stattenfield standing in the middle of a group of children." Perhaps children is the wrong thing here; um, Keith Stattenfield is a man among sheep, if he were in the field and surrounded by sheep, although now even that's starting to sound creepy. Let me start over. When, far in the future, historians attempt to write a history of the early 21st century, the name Keith Stattenfield will not be far from their lips, and not merely because by then the language will have evolved so much that "Keith Stattenfield" will now mean "Would you like to go out for Thai food?". Looking back, this profile will likely be one of the few surviving records of our time, given that in 2047 at enormous expense the entirely of its archive will be carved onto the side of the Rocky Mountains, including the bits up there in Canada. Thus, I will endeavor to only present the most undisputed facts and information about myself here, and will not mention my many awards or accolades.