Victoria Dee
I love a perfectly-placed word or ampersand, strive to tell the best stories, and always try to use my creative powers for good.
It takes the average person at least 1.5 years to notice that I am a semi-lefty (my grade one teacher taught me to write with my right hand), unless they are also a southpaw. According to one study, my lifespan is nine years fewer than that of a primarily righthanded individual so please make haste and email me if you'd like a program written or to collaborate on a project. Left-handers are also more likely to be geniuses (20% of all MENSA members report being lefthanded!) so you're basically guaranteed to get some AMAZING work from me.*
Please ignore the section on this infographic that says left-handed people are three times more likely to be heavy drinkers; I prefer tea and bagel breakfast sandwiches as my vices.
*In the off-chance that you've scrutinized the claims I've made above, 15% of the world is lefthanded, and the MENSA figure is only 5% greater than that statistic... so I have to technically say that it's only slightly more probable that you'll get genius-level work when you hire me.